(cust phones up saying she bought two bras in store but only has one. EA finds EM and asks her about it)
EA: do you remember serving a lady called Ruth? She had a sports bra and a pnl4 in pearl?
EM: errr....
EA: it says you served her...
EM: in a 30f?
EA: yeah
EM: she had a sports bra and she had one on, and she wanted me to order a soft cup for her in black and I asked her if she wanted to take the white as well and she said no.
EA: she says shes only got one bra when she got home...
EM: what?! shes wearing the other one! I wrapped the tag with the sports bra for her!
EA: oh my god! (starts laughing)
EM: what a fucktard...
(later)
EM: did you speak to her?
EA: (laughs uncontrollably) yeah!
EM: what did she say?
EA: well... she took ages to answer her phone and then I said that you were under the impression she was wearing one as you had seen she had a fitting. There was silence for about a good 30 seconds and then she said "I think you might be right" so I just said that it must have been so comfy that she forgot she was wearing it... i think its cos she's moving house.
EM: Jesus, we had a conversation about her friends postcode. she had given it to me and it came up with the right address but she kept asking if it was right and if the postcode was wrong, would the postman know where to deliver it. I lost count how many times I read back her friends address for her to go 'thats right' and then whittle on about if it was wrong...
EA: ooohhhhh god....
Monday, 29 August 2011
Monday, 15 August 2011
Monday morons
JT: how does it feel?
Cust: I don't like the colour
JT: right... Shall we try this one?
Cust: ok
JT: how does that one feel?
Cust: I really need a wee
JT: you need the toilet?!
Cust: yeah
JT: ok, but how does the bra feel?
Cust: I don't know, can I put this bra on and go for a wee?
JT: you can put your own bra on and go, you will need to go to costa as we don't have a customer toilet here...
Cust: no, it's ok...
JT: right... Shall I get you some more bras?
Cust: (starts looking all over the ceiling for about 20 seconds) ...ok...
Cust: can I get this in a different size?
EM: sure, what size do you need?
Cust: 38... (starts pulling a face like she's straining while having a shit, for a good 10 seconds) ...g?
Cust: (she has hold of two pnb5' in spearmint) I tried this on in a 30ff (holds up one bra) but I really wanted it in black but apparently you don't have it, so I tried this on (holds up other bra) and it fitted really well but I want it in black in a 30g
EM: ok, so you want that in black in a 30g?
Cust: yes, and I don't need to try it on...
Cust: I didn't want this bikini and I spoke to the girl yesterday and she said that I could have a good will discount because I'm having to make a special trip into town to swap it...
EM: oh ok, so when you bought this one did she think that you had just tried this on for size when you placed the order?
Cust: I think I confused her because I was deciding between the two
EM: right, ok...
Cust: do you have any part time jobs?
EM: I'm sorry we don't at the moment, they have all been filled
Cust: everyone wants to work in a sweet shop but I want to work in a bra shop, I'd spend all my wages here!
EM: yeah! (silence)
Cust: the girls not going to get into trouble is she because I did confuse her and I didn't check
EM: (seeing an opportunity to show her how stupid she is) well I need to check how she managed to scan and wrap the wrong bikini without you noticing... The good will discount gives you £5 off, so it will be £16 coming back to you
Cust: oh, is the one I'm returning more expensive?
EM: (deliberately pointing to the prices on the receipt that the customer has written on while making out she's checking for herself) yes
Cust: oh...
Custs daughter: shouldn't we take the bras out?!
Cust: no, just leave them in there...
JT is stood with a customer by the stairs, about a meter away from the ramp)
JT: if you just want to make your way up the ramp (points to corner where ramp starts but is hidden from view behind a low wall)
Cust: where?
JT: just over there (points again)
(cust stays where she is but looks frantically all around for this mysterious ramp)
Cust: I don't like the colour
JT: right... Shall we try this one?
Cust: ok
JT: how does that one feel?
Cust: I really need a wee
JT: you need the toilet?!
Cust: yeah
JT: ok, but how does the bra feel?
Cust: I don't know, can I put this bra on and go for a wee?
JT: you can put your own bra on and go, you will need to go to costa as we don't have a customer toilet here...
Cust: no, it's ok...
JT: right... Shall I get you some more bras?
Cust: (starts looking all over the ceiling for about 20 seconds) ...ok...
Cust: can I get this in a different size?
EM: sure, what size do you need?
Cust: 38... (starts pulling a face like she's straining while having a shit, for a good 10 seconds) ...g?
Cust: (she has hold of two pnb5' in spearmint) I tried this on in a 30ff (holds up one bra) but I really wanted it in black but apparently you don't have it, so I tried this on (holds up other bra) and it fitted really well but I want it in black in a 30g
EM: ok, so you want that in black in a 30g?
Cust: yes, and I don't need to try it on...
Cust: I didn't want this bikini and I spoke to the girl yesterday and she said that I could have a good will discount because I'm having to make a special trip into town to swap it...
EM: oh ok, so when you bought this one did she think that you had just tried this on for size when you placed the order?
Cust: I think I confused her because I was deciding between the two
EM: right, ok...
Cust: do you have any part time jobs?
EM: I'm sorry we don't at the moment, they have all been filled
Cust: everyone wants to work in a sweet shop but I want to work in a bra shop, I'd spend all my wages here!
EM: yeah! (silence)
Cust: the girls not going to get into trouble is she because I did confuse her and I didn't check
EM: (seeing an opportunity to show her how stupid she is) well I need to check how she managed to scan and wrap the wrong bikini without you noticing... The good will discount gives you £5 off, so it will be £16 coming back to you
Cust: oh, is the one I'm returning more expensive?
EM: (deliberately pointing to the prices on the receipt that the customer has written on while making out she's checking for herself) yes
Cust: oh...
Custs daughter: shouldn't we take the bras out?!
Cust: no, just leave them in there...
JT is stood with a customer by the stairs, about a meter away from the ramp)
JT: if you just want to make your way up the ramp (points to corner where ramp starts but is hidden from view behind a low wall)
Cust: where?
JT: just over there (points again)
(cust stays where she is but looks frantically all around for this mysterious ramp)
Daughter and mum
(JT comes out of her fitting room while the cust she's with puts a bra on)
Daughter: EXCUSE ME!
JT: yes... Can I help you?
Daughter: (pushes bikini top into JT's hand) get this in another size
JT: I'm in a fitting but I can get someone...
Daughter: there's no one here, can't you just get it!?
JT: I am in a fitting as I said, I can get someone for you or someone will be our here...
Daughter: there hasn't been anyone for ages!
JT: she might be fetching something from the stockroom, she has to keep running backwards and forwards from there as she's got to help all the ladies trying on. So she won't be able to stay with you while you try things on like in a fitting
Mum: I don't want a fitting...
JT: I'll go and get someone then
(MR goes out and apologises in a very passive/aggressive way, then asks what is required. Daughter stomps off in a huff)
Daughter: EXCUSE ME!
JT: yes... Can I help you?
Daughter: (pushes bikini top into JT's hand) get this in another size
JT: I'm in a fitting but I can get someone...
Daughter: there's no one here, can't you just get it!?
JT: I am in a fitting as I said, I can get someone for you or someone will be our here...
Daughter: there hasn't been anyone for ages!
JT: she might be fetching something from the stockroom, she has to keep running backwards and forwards from there as she's got to help all the ladies trying on. So she won't be able to stay with you while you try things on like in a fitting
Mum: I don't want a fitting...
JT: I'll go and get someone then
(MR goes out and apologises in a very passive/aggressive way, then asks what is required. Daughter stomps off in a huff)
TOWIE
Cust: can you get me this, apparently it's in stock...
EM: sure do you want to try that one on while I'm looking for this?
Cust: sure
(in stockroom)
JT: HA! I'm not helping her! I always help her, she's the one with the stupid glitter tattoo...
EM: is she!
JT: yeah, she likes to be really booby
EM: really? Why does she want this? (hold up Eloise bra)
JT: she'll love it, it's see through
EM: really?!
JT: yep, trust me (raises eyebrows) I know...
(EM takes bras out, cust tries them on)
Cust: what about this bulging? Is it supposed to be that bad? (looking at her back fat in the mirror)
EM: it's no worse than normal... (lies lies lies)
Cust: really!?
EM: it's because the back band is quite thin...
Cust: I suppose so... I am bulging though, is it bad?
EM: it depends what you class as bad...
EM: sure do you want to try that one on while I'm looking for this?
Cust: sure
(in stockroom)
JT: HA! I'm not helping her! I always help her, she's the one with the stupid glitter tattoo...
EM: is she!
JT: yeah, she likes to be really booby
EM: really? Why does she want this? (hold up Eloise bra)
JT: she'll love it, it's see through
EM: really?!
JT: yep, trust me (raises eyebrows) I know...
(EM takes bras out, cust tries them on)
Cust: what about this bulging? Is it supposed to be that bad? (looking at her back fat in the mirror)
EM: it's no worse than normal... (lies lies lies)
Cust: really!?
EM: it's because the back band is quite thin...
Cust: I suppose so... I am bulging though, is it bad?
EM: it depends what you class as bad...
Incredible journey
EM: ...and she came down and asked me if I was the right person to ask about a fitting!
JT: what?! No, you need the bra mystic who lives in a cave over yonder. Take this map and this yacht. Don't talk to the dragon, avoid the dragon. Go over the bridge of burden. And don't trust the genie... That's what you should of told her...
EM: well, I just said yes...
JT: what?! No, you need the bra mystic who lives in a cave over yonder. Take this map and this yacht. Don't talk to the dragon, avoid the dragon. Go over the bridge of burden. And don't trust the genie... That's what you should of told her...
EM: well, I just said yes...
Brain skillz...
Cust: can I have this in a 38ff?
JT: yep, what one is it?
Cust: the one I have on
JT: can I see it so I know what one it is?
(cust goes back to her room and shows the bra)
JT: this ones an e, a ff would be two cup sizes bigger...
Cust: is it?
JT: yes, it goes e, f, ff. So this will be two cup sizes bigger, so do you still want that?
Cust: yes, double f
(JT gets the bra and cust tries it on)
Cust: can someone have a look at this
JT: yeah! (looks at bra) it's a bit big...
Cust: can I have it in a double e?
JT: there isn't a double e, it goes straight to f
Cust: oh
(later)
Cust: can you get someone to have a look at this?
EM: yes (turns to help cust)
Cust: oh... What do you think about this?
(EM checks her in the pnn2, it looks pretty good and it's an e)
Cust: what about this? (pokes her arm fat)
EM: there's not much we can do about that as it's not your boobs...
JT: yep, what one is it?
Cust: the one I have on
JT: can I see it so I know what one it is?
(cust goes back to her room and shows the bra)
JT: this ones an e, a ff would be two cup sizes bigger...
Cust: is it?
JT: yes, it goes e, f, ff. So this will be two cup sizes bigger, so do you still want that?
Cust: yes, double f
(JT gets the bra and cust tries it on)
Cust: can someone have a look at this
JT: yeah! (looks at bra) it's a bit big...
Cust: can I have it in a double e?
JT: there isn't a double e, it goes straight to f
Cust: oh
(later)
Cust: can you get someone to have a look at this?
EM: yes (turns to help cust)
Cust: oh... What do you think about this?
(EM checks her in the pnn2, it looks pretty good and it's an e)
Cust: what about this? (pokes her arm fat)
EM: there's not much we can do about that as it's not your boobs...
Proposition
(while JT was walking across Jesus green, a guy checks her out and when JT ignored him, he stopped in front of her and flicked one of her earphones out and propositioned her with this)
Man: you look like you can take a strong black cock
JT: no thank you!
Man: you look like you can take a strong black cock
JT: no thank you!
Saturday, 13 August 2011
Saturday makes us wonder...
Cust: can I try this in a white in a 36hh (hold up a fa51 in black)
EM: that one only goes up to a g
Cust: oh, I've got this one in a hh at home, it is the panache one?
EM: it's made by fantasie, have you got the one with seams? That one goes up to a k
Cust: no, it doesn't have seams it's the smooth one...
EM: panache do a seam free moulded one but again that only goes up to a g
Cust: oh g, well can I try this in a 36gg?
EM: it only goes up to a g
Cust: yes, gg
EM: it only goes up to a g
Cust: oh, a g
EM: do you still want to try it?
Cust: yes
(EM gets the fa51 but it's in nude and also brings the png8 in white in a 36hh)
EM: right, I've got this one but we only have it in nude. I did bring this one which is the smooth panache one in a 36hh
Cust: yes, I did have a feel (of the one she has on) and I think it has seams, I really want it in black
EM: I didn't look for black as you asked me for a white one which is why I brought this (holds out png8)
Cust: it's black that I need as I've washed it so much I really need to replace it as it's falling apart
EM: ok, I'll go and have a look (starts to go to the stockroom)
Cust: and I've lost weight, so I might need a 34, but I don't know what cup... Don't you need to change it if you go down a back size?
EM: yes, you need to go up in the cup, so you would need a 34j
Cust: yes, if I could try that...
EM: that one only goes up to a g
Cust: oh, I've got this one in a hh at home, it is the panache one?
EM: it's made by fantasie, have you got the one with seams? That one goes up to a k
Cust: no, it doesn't have seams it's the smooth one...
EM: panache do a seam free moulded one but again that only goes up to a g
Cust: oh g, well can I try this in a 36gg?
EM: it only goes up to a g
Cust: yes, gg
EM: it only goes up to a g
Cust: oh, a g
EM: do you still want to try it?
Cust: yes
(EM gets the fa51 but it's in nude and also brings the png8 in white in a 36hh)
EM: right, I've got this one but we only have it in nude. I did bring this one which is the smooth panache one in a 36hh
Cust: yes, I did have a feel (of the one she has on) and I think it has seams, I really want it in black
EM: I didn't look for black as you asked me for a white one which is why I brought this (holds out png8)
Cust: it's black that I need as I've washed it so much I really need to replace it as it's falling apart
EM: ok, I'll go and have a look (starts to go to the stockroom)
Cust: and I've lost weight, so I might need a 34, but I don't know what cup... Don't you need to change it if you go down a back size?
EM: yes, you need to go up in the cup, so you would need a 34j
Cust: yes, if I could try that...
Bitch
EM: hi, how can I help
Cust: I thought I had the hang of this but the girl upstairs gave me this (hands EM a piece of paper) I don't know why she gave me this as I found them all upstairs...
EM: this is so I can find the right sizes in the right styles in the stock room
Cust: I had them all and she took them and gave me this
EM: you found all of these in a 36f upstairs
Cust: yes
EM: ok, well I'll go up and find them
(EM goes into the stockroom and finds three of the four in there, but goes upstairs to ask GP what's going on and to have a look anyway. GP said the lady just pointed to the styles she wanted and then GP just took one of each over to the till so she could check for the size. There were no 36f's upstairs)
EM: I have these three and I'm still looking for one of them but I checked upstairs and I couldn't find any 36f's
Cust: well I had them
EM: you actually had all of these in a f? I had to get these three from the stockroom...
Cust: yes. And I've had these two before, I have it in the grey...
EM: oh... We haven't had this one in grey before...
Cust: well, black, whatever you call it. It looks grey... But it's the one you don't have I wanted...
EM: well this black one is the same style as the pink, so if you give that a try...
Cust: it's the pink one I had in the right size...
EM: I'll go upstairs again and have a look for it...
(EM goes up and quizzes GP again)
EM: she didn't have anything in her hand?
GP: no, I asked her how I can help and she pointed to them and said she wanted them in a 36f and I took one of each so I could check them...
EM: because she said she had this one (points to the candy pink one) in the right size, your sure she wasn't holding anything? (EM looks around to see if the coast is clear) she's turning into a right bitch about it...
GP: no, she just pointed...
EM: right, I'll just take her what we have up here in an F
(EM goes back down, she's not there, so EM goes back up and finds her by the soft cups)
EM: hi, I can't find this in a 36f anywhere and these are the two f cups that were upstairs, in a 34 or a 38
Cust: I've been measured before and I know I'm a 36 so I'll just wait until you get it back in stock
(EM starts thinking 'what, you just told me that you had it up here in that size')
EM: and we don't have the 16 in the thong...
Cust: well I'm a 14-16
EM: there was a 14 there...
Cust: well it's irrelevant as you don't have the bra... Find me the 14 or 16 in the pants for this... (pink Royce)
(EM crouches down and looks)
EM: we have a 16 but not a 14
(hands cust the 16)
Cust: that looks far too big, I'm very small over the hips
EM: we have a 12...
(EM holds up the 12 which the cust takes and then shoves the discarded 16 so far in EM's face that she has to lean backwards)
Cust: yes that's better, and find them in this colour...
EM: ok...
(EM finds them for her, rehangs the 16's in the pink and doesn't even get a thank you, EM puts the 16's back and walks off)
Cust: I thought I had the hang of this but the girl upstairs gave me this (hands EM a piece of paper) I don't know why she gave me this as I found them all upstairs...
EM: this is so I can find the right sizes in the right styles in the stock room
Cust: I had them all and she took them and gave me this
EM: you found all of these in a 36f upstairs
Cust: yes
EM: ok, well I'll go up and find them
(EM goes into the stockroom and finds three of the four in there, but goes upstairs to ask GP what's going on and to have a look anyway. GP said the lady just pointed to the styles she wanted and then GP just took one of each over to the till so she could check for the size. There were no 36f's upstairs)
EM: I have these three and I'm still looking for one of them but I checked upstairs and I couldn't find any 36f's
Cust: well I had them
EM: you actually had all of these in a f? I had to get these three from the stockroom...
Cust: yes. And I've had these two before, I have it in the grey...
EM: oh... We haven't had this one in grey before...
Cust: well, black, whatever you call it. It looks grey... But it's the one you don't have I wanted...
EM: well this black one is the same style as the pink, so if you give that a try...
Cust: it's the pink one I had in the right size...
EM: I'll go upstairs again and have a look for it...
(EM goes up and quizzes GP again)
EM: she didn't have anything in her hand?
GP: no, I asked her how I can help and she pointed to them and said she wanted them in a 36f and I took one of each so I could check them...
EM: because she said she had this one (points to the candy pink one) in the right size, your sure she wasn't holding anything? (EM looks around to see if the coast is clear) she's turning into a right bitch about it...
GP: no, she just pointed...
EM: right, I'll just take her what we have up here in an F
(EM goes back down, she's not there, so EM goes back up and finds her by the soft cups)
EM: hi, I can't find this in a 36f anywhere and these are the two f cups that were upstairs, in a 34 or a 38
Cust: I've been measured before and I know I'm a 36 so I'll just wait until you get it back in stock
(EM starts thinking 'what, you just told me that you had it up here in that size')
EM: and we don't have the 16 in the thong...
Cust: well I'm a 14-16
EM: there was a 14 there...
Cust: well it's irrelevant as you don't have the bra... Find me the 14 or 16 in the pants for this... (pink Royce)
(EM crouches down and looks)
EM: we have a 16 but not a 14
(hands cust the 16)
Cust: that looks far too big, I'm very small over the hips
EM: we have a 12...
(EM holds up the 12 which the cust takes and then shoves the discarded 16 so far in EM's face that she has to lean backwards)
Cust: yes that's better, and find them in this colour...
EM: ok...
(EM finds them for her, rehangs the 16's in the pink and doesn't even get a thank you, EM puts the 16's back and walks off)
Monday, 8 August 2011
Think before you speak...
KM: these thongs... Do you want them out?
EM: yes please...
KM: there's not really room...
EM: can you squeeze some out?
KM: I can get a few...
EM: that's fine...
HS: squeeze some out on the shop floor....
EM: (by the water cooler getting a drink) ohhh... I've got a pull in my tights...
HS: (by the booth) you have a WHAT?!
EM: (really confused) a pull?
(HS laughs hysterically. VG appears)
VG: what's going on?
HS: I just thought EM said she had a poo in her tights!
EM: A PULL!
EM: what are you doing with that bag?
HS: suffocating myself...
EM: why?
HS: ohhhh... I want to die!
(EM blows up a bag and pretends to pop it next to HS's ear)
HS: that's a form of torture... And I'm being tortured by the house of sugagirls and babes aloud... Awwww! See!? Sugababes and girls aloud...
EM: yes please...
KM: there's not really room...
EM: can you squeeze some out?
KM: I can get a few...
EM: that's fine...
HS: squeeze some out on the shop floor....
EM: (by the water cooler getting a drink) ohhh... I've got a pull in my tights...
HS: (by the booth) you have a WHAT?!
EM: (really confused) a pull?
(HS laughs hysterically. VG appears)
VG: what's going on?
HS: I just thought EM said she had a poo in her tights!
EM: A PULL!
EM: what are you doing with that bag?
HS: suffocating myself...
EM: why?
HS: ohhhh... I want to die!
(EM blows up a bag and pretends to pop it next to HS's ear)
HS: that's a form of torture... And I'm being tortured by the house of sugagirls and babes aloud... Awwww! See!? Sugababes and girls aloud...
Moments from Saturday
Cust: can I have a fitting?
EM: sure, I have a fitter free now. What are you looking for?
Cust: I need a bra for a dress which I have with me and I need to check to see if my bras are salvageable...
EM: ok... Let me get your fitter
(in stockroom)
EM: ok, I have a lady with a dress who needs a bra for it and she also wants all her old bras checked to see if she can still wear them. Who wants to do it?
EA: SHOTGUN NOT ME!
JT: awww...I'll do it... If EA did anything!
(JT takes her through and EM listens to the start of the fitting)
Cust: I've got some bras which I'm hoping are salvageable as I've lost some weight, so maybe if you tighten the straps they might fit...
(later, in stockroom)
EM: so how many bras does she want you to tighten the straps of?
JT: twelve! And she has two dresses!
(after the fitting and on the shop floor)
HP: do you want the matching bottoms?
Cust: oh! They come with them?
HP: yep, there over here...
(leads cust over. Cust drops the bag she was carrying and then drops her water bottle as she tries to pick up her bag)
Cust: I'm looking for a tankini and I don't know what sizes you have in your store room...
EM: ok
Cust: I'm hoping to try something in my size?
EM: ok, what size are you looking for?
Cust: 30ff, I'm looking for something dark (she has two Anna tankinis in her hand and two pairs of bottoms)
EM: ok, 30ff, are either of those near that size?
Cust: I've got a 32gg and a...32h
EM: ok, and the bottoms?
Cust: there both an 8
EM: what size did you want in them?
Cust: I don't know what size I need... 10... 12...
EM: what size jeans do you take?
Cust: 10... In either shorts or big briefs...
EM: right, let me go and have a look for you...
Cust: I want to try this bikini in a 34e... I've got these to try if you don't have it...
EM: right... (she has four electric zebra bikinis) let me check for you...
(later)
EM: we do have the 34e
Cust: ok, you can have these back then... (hands over the bikinis)
EM: lovely, I will take those back upstairs
(had a look through them and the sizes she had picked were: 32f, 32ff, 36g and 38e)
EM: (buzzes HP back to get some more info about Bridget, the next fitting) has Bridget been fitted by us before and do you know what she's after?
HP: I don't know about fitting but she needs a bra checking and she's just on her way down the stairs...
(cust appears just as HP finishes talking)
Cust: (gets hubby a drink of water in one of our cups and then comes over to the desk) hi I'm Bridget, I'm here for a fitting...
EM: lovely, do you...
Cust: (interrupting) shall I take a seat?
EM: Yes, that's fine. I'll just let...
(cust wanders off while EM is talking to her. EM goes upstairs to see HP)
EM: did you give them a cup?
HP: yeah! He said he wasn't feeling well and I tried to buzz but then I just got some water for him. I did say sorry it's a but warm. He's just come out of hospital and he's not got enough oxygen in his heart!
EM: right...
HP: so your husbands not well and you drag him in here bra shopping...
EM: and in this heat... In a coat...
EM: sure, I have a fitter free now. What are you looking for?
Cust: I need a bra for a dress which I have with me and I need to check to see if my bras are salvageable...
EM: ok... Let me get your fitter
(in stockroom)
EM: ok, I have a lady with a dress who needs a bra for it and she also wants all her old bras checked to see if she can still wear them. Who wants to do it?
EA: SHOTGUN NOT ME!
JT: awww...I'll do it... If EA did anything!
(JT takes her through and EM listens to the start of the fitting)
Cust: I've got some bras which I'm hoping are salvageable as I've lost some weight, so maybe if you tighten the straps they might fit...
(later, in stockroom)
EM: so how many bras does she want you to tighten the straps of?
JT: twelve! And she has two dresses!
(after the fitting and on the shop floor)
HP: do you want the matching bottoms?
Cust: oh! They come with them?
HP: yep, there over here...
(leads cust over. Cust drops the bag she was carrying and then drops her water bottle as she tries to pick up her bag)
Cust: I'm looking for a tankini and I don't know what sizes you have in your store room...
EM: ok
Cust: I'm hoping to try something in my size?
EM: ok, what size are you looking for?
Cust: 30ff, I'm looking for something dark (she has two Anna tankinis in her hand and two pairs of bottoms)
EM: ok, 30ff, are either of those near that size?
Cust: I've got a 32gg and a...32h
EM: ok, and the bottoms?
Cust: there both an 8
EM: what size did you want in them?
Cust: I don't know what size I need... 10... 12...
EM: what size jeans do you take?
Cust: 10... In either shorts or big briefs...
EM: right, let me go and have a look for you...
Cust: I want to try this bikini in a 34e... I've got these to try if you don't have it...
EM: right... (she has four electric zebra bikinis) let me check for you...
(later)
EM: we do have the 34e
Cust: ok, you can have these back then... (hands over the bikinis)
EM: lovely, I will take those back upstairs
(had a look through them and the sizes she had picked were: 32f, 32ff, 36g and 38e)
EM: (buzzes HP back to get some more info about Bridget, the next fitting) has Bridget been fitted by us before and do you know what she's after?
HP: I don't know about fitting but she needs a bra checking and she's just on her way down the stairs...
(cust appears just as HP finishes talking)
Cust: (gets hubby a drink of water in one of our cups and then comes over to the desk) hi I'm Bridget, I'm here for a fitting...
EM: lovely, do you...
Cust: (interrupting) shall I take a seat?
EM: Yes, that's fine. I'll just let...
(cust wanders off while EM is talking to her. EM goes upstairs to see HP)
EM: did you give them a cup?
HP: yeah! He said he wasn't feeling well and I tried to buzz but then I just got some water for him. I did say sorry it's a but warm. He's just come out of hospital and he's not got enough oxygen in his heart!
EM: right...
HP: so your husbands not well and you drag him in here bra shopping...
EM: and in this heat... In a coat...
Sunday, 7 August 2011
Shortest day, biggest horror
Cust: I want this in a 14
EM: ok, and what curvy-ness?
Cust: err, the smallest one?
EM: have you tried our clothing before?
Cust: no... I've had the support tops so the same in those...
EM: there done by bra size, so pretty much if you...
Cust: (interrupting) just the smallest one...
EM: right...
EM: ok, and what curvy-ness?
Cust: err, the smallest one?
EM: have you tried our clothing before?
Cust: no... I've had the support tops so the same in those...
EM: there done by bra size, so pretty much if you...
Cust: (interrupting) just the smallest one...
EM: right...
Saturday, 6 August 2011
Big
EM: I've got a fitting for you (EM sniggers)
JT: what? What are you laughing at?
EM: nothing...
HS: did you take two 34gg's in white from the booth?
JT: no... Why are you laughing? Is she huge?
EM: I'm laughing because I think I took the bras and I don't know what I've done with them... Her name is Sandra and she's with her daughter...
JT: is her daughter huge?
EM: no...
JT: ok... (off she goes)
EM: she's massive
HS: oh, is that why you were laughing
(later)
JT: thank you! She told me she has limited mobility and she bent over and her daughter took Sandra's t-shirt off and she was a circle! The back of her bra was up by her neck! She said it was a little big! It took me and her daughter to do up a 40! And she was sweating, it was running off her!
EM: (laughs uncontrollably) soz!
JT: what? What are you laughing at?
EM: nothing...
HS: did you take two 34gg's in white from the booth?
JT: no... Why are you laughing? Is she huge?
EM: I'm laughing because I think I took the bras and I don't know what I've done with them... Her name is Sandra and she's with her daughter...
JT: is her daughter huge?
EM: no...
JT: ok... (off she goes)
EM: she's massive
HS: oh, is that why you were laughing
(later)
JT: thank you! She told me she has limited mobility and she bent over and her daughter took Sandra's t-shirt off and she was a circle! The back of her bra was up by her neck! She said it was a little big! It took me and her daughter to do up a 40! And she was sweating, it was running off her!
EM: (laughs uncontrollably) soz!
Memory
EM: are you finding bras for a lady in a purple top?
GP: I'm finding black bras...
EM: I don't know what she's after but she's wearing purple...
GP: I'm really sorry I don't remember...
EM: (laughs) oh, ok, well I think she's waiting outside
GP: yeah, that's her
GP: I'm finding black bras...
EM: I don't know what she's after but she's wearing purple...
GP: I'm really sorry I don't remember...
EM: (laughs) oh, ok, well I think she's waiting outside
GP: yeah, that's her
Wednesday, 3 August 2011
Stab stab
Cust: can I try these in a large?
VG: ok, I'll have a look
(in stockroom)
VG: are these in the sale? (holds up a pair of old bikini bottoms)
EM: no
VG: are there any upstairs?
EM: no, we only had four pairs, one small, one medium, one large, one extra large...
VG: she's after the large...
EM: that's what she asked me to save! there's the extra large...
VG: this is a medium...
EM: so she must have them!
VG: urgh...
(EM and VG go back out to the fitting rooms, EM is next door to the douche that VG has and only hears the first part of the conversation)
VG: I only have the medium and extra large in the stockroom so I brought them so you can give them a try...
Cust: I asked the girl to save the medium and the large...
(later, EM and VG both stop talking to their custs at the same time and head to the stock room)
EM: she only asked me to save the one pair she handed to me...
VG: did you hear the rest of the conversation?
EM: no...
VG: I asked her what size she had and pointed to the ones on the floor and she told me they were a medium, I said 'oh that's funny as the tag has an L on it' and she said 'no there a medium' and I said 'do you want me to check as the L stands for large' and then she said 'errr, oh, hang on'. She's a complete twat, but you have to admit she's funny!
EM: not after an hour she's not...!
VG: ok, I'll have a look
(in stockroom)
VG: are these in the sale? (holds up a pair of old bikini bottoms)
EM: no
VG: are there any upstairs?
EM: no, we only had four pairs, one small, one medium, one large, one extra large...
VG: she's after the large...
EM: that's what she asked me to save! there's the extra large...
VG: this is a medium...
EM: so she must have them!
VG: urgh...
(EM and VG go back out to the fitting rooms, EM is next door to the douche that VG has and only hears the first part of the conversation)
VG: I only have the medium and extra large in the stockroom so I brought them so you can give them a try...
Cust: I asked the girl to save the medium and the large...
(later, EM and VG both stop talking to their custs at the same time and head to the stock room)
EM: she only asked me to save the one pair she handed to me...
VG: did you hear the rest of the conversation?
EM: no...
VG: I asked her what size she had and pointed to the ones on the floor and she told me they were a medium, I said 'oh that's funny as the tag has an L on it' and she said 'no there a medium' and I said 'do you want me to check as the L stands for large' and then she said 'errr, oh, hang on'. She's a complete twat, but you have to admit she's funny!
EM: not after an hour she's not...!
Listen to me...
Cust: can I try these in a 30h?
EM: I'll give it a go in this one (electric zebra bikini) but these two only go up to a g (tassia and blue check bandeau bikinis)
Cust: double g?
EM: no... They only go up to a g.
Custs mum: just try them in a g!
Cust: ok, can I try a g?
EM: I'll give it a go in this one (electric zebra bikini) but these two only go up to a g (tassia and blue check bandeau bikinis)
Cust: double g?
EM: no... They only go up to a g.
Custs mum: just try them in a g!
Cust: ok, can I try a g?
Monday, 1 August 2011
Bikini
This started at about 3pm...
Cust: I like this bikini do you have the bottoms?
EM: is that a sale one?
Cust: I think so...
EM: then everything we have should be upstairs
Cust: could you check on the computer?
EM: (checks) well we should have some
Cust: I looked everywhere and I couldn't see any, maybe they have them behind the till?
EM: right, let me go and have a look for you...
(EM checks upstairs and there isn't any, checks the stock room and there all in there. EM grabs them and heads up the back stairs again with them, so she can come down the main stairs and say 'ta-da' to the cust. However customer is now upstairs and spots her)
Cust: oh you've found them, is there more round there? (goes round the corner)
EM: no, I had to grab them off a colleague and then I was asked to bring up a bra
Cust: oh? (EM hands her the pants and rushes off to the till where there was another lady waiting)
Later...
(cust comes out after trying on and goes over to EM, after already tapping JT on the shoulder while she was writing down information for her customer she was already with)
Cust: this is the only one I saw upstairs, do you have any others?
EM: we don't but we could mail order other sizes if they are available
Cust: could you check?
EM: yes... The 32e is in stock at the warehouse...
Cust: (interrupting) how long will that take?
EM: about 3-5 working days straight to you...
Cust: ahh, that's quite quick...
EM: yep, and it's free post if you order in store...
Cust: I'm normally a 32e but this is a 30 and I don't know if it's too tight, but sometimes when I try on 32 back bras, some fit and some are too lose, but then I wonder if this might stretch after its been worn and then be fine, and if I order the 32 and it's fine now I don't want it to be too big after I've worn it. They do stretch don't they?
EM: they will do, it's like any bra
Cust: well maybe you could have a look at this on me?
EM: yes that's fine...
(EM then deals with the five ladies who have been waiting while the cust has been drivelling on about her bras and then goes and checks the cust)
EM: right let's have a look at the back (checked, it's fine) it looks small in the cup...
Cust: just a little bit...
EM: ok, let's have a look at the front... See here on your smaller side it's a little bit small but on your larger side your falling out over the top...
Cust: so would a 32e work?
EM: probably in the cup but then the back might just ride up...
Cust: oh no, I hate that... So it would be a 30f, what I really need to do is try it. I have put on 15 kilograms... 10 kilograms... so if I lose it then the 30e might fit...
EM: do you loose it from your bust?
Cust: yes, I don't know what to do, I am planning on loosing weight...
EM: well if you know it's going to go off your boobs then take the 30e, you might find that the f will fit you now but not if you loose weight...
Cust: but I don't want it too small and be coming out... I really need to try it...
EM: unfortunately we don't have it in stock but we can have a look at mail ordering it... I will need to check for you as I only looked for the 32e you asked me for
Cust: ok, could you...
(EM goes and checks)
EM: the 30f is at another store so it would be about 7-10 working days
Cust: ok... Thanks...
(cust comes out of room)
Cust: so does it come here?
EM: no, it gets sent straight to your home address
Cust: I live in France... Can I get it sent here?
EM: unfortunately we can't get anything sent here, it can go to your home address or any other address...
Cust: I work in a school and I don't want it sent there...
EM: right... The only other way is to phone all the stores and find our who has them and get them to send it via our couriers but that could take up to 10-14 days
Cust: could you do that?
EM: (looks at her with a 'you have to be kidding me' expression) yes, there is 20 stores to phone so it's not going to be instant though.
Cust: well maybe the first one you phone has it
EM: they might but if I take your name and phone number I can give you a ring and let you know when I've got hold of one for you...
(cust writes down details)
Cust: can you keep hold of these until then
EM: sure, no problem...
(later)
Cust: the lady with short hair was phoning all the stores about a bikini for me...
KB: yes, she's on the phone about that...
Cust: do you know how she's getting on?
KB: let me just find out... (talks to EM) she's only manages to phone three as its very busy and everywhere shuts at 4pm so she's not been able to get through to many of them... She's got your name and number so she can call you when she gets hold of someone who has it but it's probably not going to be today...
Cust: oh, ok...
(later still, about 3:39pm)
Cust: the lady with short hair is phoning all the stores about a bikini in a 30f, can she do the same for this one? (holds up orange gingham one)
JT: I'll have to check, she's trying to help all the ladies trying on and phone up about your bikini...
Cust: if you could...
(JT comes downstairs...)
JT: she wants you to phone about this one too...
EM: your fucking kidding me... Is it even available?! (EM checks... It's sold out) that's a no then...
JT: I'll go tell her...
(upstairs)
JT: I'm afraid that this one has sold out so she won't be able to phone about this one
Cust: what do you mean?
JT: we have checked the stock for you and it's a zero, there isn't any left in the ware house, any other stores or here...
Cust: what about the Internet?
JT: the Internet shows the same Stoke levels as the system we check, like when we checked for the other bikini, there is none left in the uk I'm sorry to say...
Cust: ok (she just leaves)
DICKSPLASH!
Cust: I like this bikini do you have the bottoms?
EM: is that a sale one?
Cust: I think so...
EM: then everything we have should be upstairs
Cust: could you check on the computer?
EM: (checks) well we should have some
Cust: I looked everywhere and I couldn't see any, maybe they have them behind the till?
EM: right, let me go and have a look for you...
(EM checks upstairs and there isn't any, checks the stock room and there all in there. EM grabs them and heads up the back stairs again with them, so she can come down the main stairs and say 'ta-da' to the cust. However customer is now upstairs and spots her)
Cust: oh you've found them, is there more round there? (goes round the corner)
EM: no, I had to grab them off a colleague and then I was asked to bring up a bra
Cust: oh? (EM hands her the pants and rushes off to the till where there was another lady waiting)
Later...
(cust comes out after trying on and goes over to EM, after already tapping JT on the shoulder while she was writing down information for her customer she was already with)
Cust: this is the only one I saw upstairs, do you have any others?
EM: we don't but we could mail order other sizes if they are available
Cust: could you check?
EM: yes... The 32e is in stock at the warehouse...
Cust: (interrupting) how long will that take?
EM: about 3-5 working days straight to you...
Cust: ahh, that's quite quick...
EM: yep, and it's free post if you order in store...
Cust: I'm normally a 32e but this is a 30 and I don't know if it's too tight, but sometimes when I try on 32 back bras, some fit and some are too lose, but then I wonder if this might stretch after its been worn and then be fine, and if I order the 32 and it's fine now I don't want it to be too big after I've worn it. They do stretch don't they?
EM: they will do, it's like any bra
Cust: well maybe you could have a look at this on me?
EM: yes that's fine...
(EM then deals with the five ladies who have been waiting while the cust has been drivelling on about her bras and then goes and checks the cust)
EM: right let's have a look at the back (checked, it's fine) it looks small in the cup...
Cust: just a little bit...
EM: ok, let's have a look at the front... See here on your smaller side it's a little bit small but on your larger side your falling out over the top...
Cust: so would a 32e work?
EM: probably in the cup but then the back might just ride up...
Cust: oh no, I hate that... So it would be a 30f, what I really need to do is try it. I have put on 15 kilograms... 10 kilograms... so if I lose it then the 30e might fit...
EM: do you loose it from your bust?
Cust: yes, I don't know what to do, I am planning on loosing weight...
EM: well if you know it's going to go off your boobs then take the 30e, you might find that the f will fit you now but not if you loose weight...
Cust: but I don't want it too small and be coming out... I really need to try it...
EM: unfortunately we don't have it in stock but we can have a look at mail ordering it... I will need to check for you as I only looked for the 32e you asked me for
Cust: ok, could you...
(EM goes and checks)
EM: the 30f is at another store so it would be about 7-10 working days
Cust: ok... Thanks...
(cust comes out of room)
Cust: so does it come here?
EM: no, it gets sent straight to your home address
Cust: I live in France... Can I get it sent here?
EM: unfortunately we can't get anything sent here, it can go to your home address or any other address...
Cust: I work in a school and I don't want it sent there...
EM: right... The only other way is to phone all the stores and find our who has them and get them to send it via our couriers but that could take up to 10-14 days
Cust: could you do that?
EM: (looks at her with a 'you have to be kidding me' expression) yes, there is 20 stores to phone so it's not going to be instant though.
Cust: well maybe the first one you phone has it
EM: they might but if I take your name and phone number I can give you a ring and let you know when I've got hold of one for you...
(cust writes down details)
Cust: can you keep hold of these until then
EM: sure, no problem...
(later)
Cust: the lady with short hair was phoning all the stores about a bikini for me...
KB: yes, she's on the phone about that...
Cust: do you know how she's getting on?
KB: let me just find out... (talks to EM) she's only manages to phone three as its very busy and everywhere shuts at 4pm so she's not been able to get through to many of them... She's got your name and number so she can call you when she gets hold of someone who has it but it's probably not going to be today...
Cust: oh, ok...
(later still, about 3:39pm)
Cust: the lady with short hair is phoning all the stores about a bikini in a 30f, can she do the same for this one? (holds up orange gingham one)
JT: I'll have to check, she's trying to help all the ladies trying on and phone up about your bikini...
Cust: if you could...
(JT comes downstairs...)
JT: she wants you to phone about this one too...
EM: your fucking kidding me... Is it even available?! (EM checks... It's sold out) that's a no then...
JT: I'll go tell her...
(upstairs)
JT: I'm afraid that this one has sold out so she won't be able to phone about this one
Cust: what do you mean?
JT: we have checked the stock for you and it's a zero, there isn't any left in the ware house, any other stores or here...
Cust: what about the Internet?
JT: the Internet shows the same Stoke levels as the system we check, like when we checked for the other bikini, there is none left in the uk I'm sorry to say...
Cust: ok (she just leaves)
DICKSPLASH!
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